time cast a spell on you but you won't forget me

For you I was a flame
Love is a losing game
Five story fire as you came
Love is a losing game

One I wish I never played
Oh what a mess we made
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game

Played out by the band
Love is a losing hand
More than I could stand
Love is a losing hand

Self professed... profound
Till the chips were down
...know you're a gambling man
Love is a losing hand

Though I'm rather blind
Love is a fate resigned
Memories mar my mind
Love is a fate resigned

Over futile odds
And laughed at by the gods
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game

i had been thinking about this song a lot, for no particular reason. i hadn't listened to it in a while and just now it showed up on a CD i made a year ago. there was a period of months, last year, when i had this song on constant repeat. i don't know what happened, maybe i reconciled my issues (at least enough not to have to hash them out through song) but it just kind of disappeared. i suppose it still speaks to me. in the months when this song was always playing, i was sad, sad over a love that i had lost --- and when i say "had lost", i mean i was an active participant in the losing --- and sad that i couldn't figure out what was going on. it's easy to like a song that blames everyone involved. i can blame myself enough but i can never share.

right now, on my ipod, there is a playlist. the title of it is an acronym for which i will not spell out. it doesn't matter, on my ipod it only shows up as "wissly" --- yes, W.I.S.S.L.Y. i have listened to it straight for almost three weeks. it's almost losing its effect. and then i heard a song that i knew IMMEDIATELY had to go on this playlist...it fit the bill perfectly. and it all came back to me. i love how songs can make you remember.

so how do i feel now? well i don't know. all i know is the song is still damn good and, well, i liked it for a reason.